I believe that Satan’s greatest ploys against us are rejection, condemnation, and fear. Each of these is related to the others. Rejection leads to a feeling of condemnation and condemnation leads to feelings of fear. If we experience constant rejection as children, we will develop a sense that there is something wrong with us that keeps others from loving us and meeting our needs. That sense of defectiveness then brings on a sense of shame and self-condemnation expressed through the constant question, “What’s wrong with me?”

As we feel that, we begin to fear that our needs for identity(significance), protection, and provision won’t ever be met. When we begin to fear that no one out there will ever love us, protect us, or provide for us we take on an orphan mindset and begin to build all kinds of walls around our hearts to protect ourselves while at the same time becoming more desperate for someone to love. When we are desperate, we make bad decisions. We trade sex for the temporary feeling of love. We become control freaks in an effort to maintain any relationship that even hints at love. Or we give up and withdraw to places that human love can’t touch.

The real goal of Satan, is to get us to take our human fears, hurts, and disappointments and lay that template on God so that we assume or fear that he, like others before him, will not love us, protect us, or provide for us. If we could look back and see the invisible realm, we would discover that Satan is the one who had been whispering condemnation to us all along which robbed us of our self-worth (identity) and instilled fear in our hearts that our greatest needs would never be met.

I see this dynamic in the parable of the son who left home in Luke 15. Jesus told the story of a young man who grew up with a loving father who provided him with identity, security, and provision. However, the arrogance of youth overcame his surroundings and his good judgment. He demanded his inheritance long before his father died and departed for the big city. We are told, “He squandered his wealth in wild living. After he had spent everything, there was a severe famine in that whole country and he began to be in need. So he went and hired himself out to a citizen of that country, who sent him to his fields to feed pigs. He longed to fill his stomach with the pods that the pigs were eating, but no one gave him anything. When he came to his senses, he said, ‘How many of my father’s hired men have food to spare, and here I am starving to death. I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of the hired men.’ So he got up and went to his father. ” (Lk.15:13-20).

Because of destructive choices, this young man had lost his identity. He had experienced rejection and abandonment from all of those who had been his friends when he used to party and he had felt the sting of hunger and homelessness. He no longer saw himself as the son of a wealthy father but as a hired man or a servant. He was full of shame and condemnation and he feared more rejection even from his father. This young man had forgotten who he was, but he had also forgotten who his father was. He had taken the template of his experiences in the world and laid that template on his father.

I have no doubt that he debated going home for much longer than he should. He anticipated that his father would pile shame on the shame he was already feeling and add rejection to the rejection he was already administering to himself. Only when he felt absolutely desperate did he decide to go home, take his father’s anticipated verbal beating, and settle in as a servant in order to survive.

That is the picture Satan always paints for us when we have stumbled or fallen. He whispers condemnation. “You are no longer worthy to be a son or daughter of God. You have sinned against God and are despised in heaven. You don’t belong there anymore and because you have defiled your birthright, God will no longer provide, protect, or treat you as family. At best, he will take you as a hired-hand, but all you will ever have will be hard work, meager food, basic housing, and the fear of being dismissed every day of your life.”

But that is not who God is and that is not who you are. When the son came home, he had already determined that he had squandered his position as a son. He awaited the disdain of a father whom he had forgotten. But the Father saw him when he was a long way off. He ran to the son and threw his arms around him. He stopped the condemning speech of the young man, declared that his son was home, put the family robe on him, slipped a son’s ring on his finger, and called for a celebration.

The father waited all that time without condemnation in his heart. He still considered the young man to be his son. He watched longingly for him daily and when the son returned with sorrow in his heart for the life he had lived, he was restored immediately with shouts of celebration. God is not a rejecting father or an abandoning friend. He is not the author of rejection, shame, or condemnation. Satan is the author and sustainer of those dark feelings.

When the enemy comes and whisper’s his lies, refuse to put the template of a worldly father or a failed friend or spouse on him for his love is an everlasting love. Even when we wander away, God always leaves the light on for us. When fear, rejection and condemnation come from the enemy, remember who God really is and who you are in Christ. Be sure to remind Satan as well.

Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. Romans 8:1

For we have not been given a spirit of fear, but of power, love and a sound mind. 1 Timothy 1:7

God has said, ‘Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.’ Hebrews 13:5

Because you are sons, God sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, the Spirit who calls out, “Abba, Father.” So you are no longer a slave, but a son; and since you are a son, God has made you also an heir. Galatians 4:6-7