As we continue this series on why people find themselves angry at God, I want to mention that disappointment may not be the same as anger. There are times when I have prayed for something and was disappointed that God did not answer that prayer as I had desired or imagined it. However, I continued in my belief that that God is good and faithful and that his decision not to answer my prayer at that time was still in my best interest or in someone else’s best interest. We only become angry when we feel that God has wronged us or betrayed us. It is in that moment, that we judge God as being untrustworthy, unfair, or uncaring. That is the position that puts us in spiritual danger because the moment we decide that God cannot be trusted, we cannot have faith in him and we are saved by grace through faith. In fact, in several places in the book of Numbers, God declared that Israel treated him with contempt because they had not believed him when he said he would give them victory over the tribes and even the “giants” in Canaan as he had promised. Distrust is unbelief and unbelief is an attitude that will distance us from God and his blessings if not dealt with.
The second reason I listed that may cause us to we be angry with God is that we may fail to recognize that many of God’s promises are conditional and, perhaps, we have not yet met those conditions. A quick look at Deuteronomy 28 will reveal that it is always God’s desire to bless his people. He lists a bevy of blessings that he wants to bestow on Israel, but the promise begins with the condition that Israel continue to be faithful to him and that they would be careful to keep his commandments. The conditional statement takes the form of, “If you are careful to… then I will.”
As I mentioned in my last blog, God is a good parent and will not reinforce sinful behaviors with quickly answered prayers and showers of blessings, because to do so would convince us that sin is not an issue and, therefore, would place us in danger. I have seen far too many believers live as if God’s commands didn’t matter. Whether it was in shady business dealings, a sinful relationship, continuing substance abuse, a “little pornography,” or years of anger and verbal abuse heaped on a spouse or a child, many believers justify themselves in those actions or believe that God’s grace will cover those behaviors even without confession and repentance.
John instructs us when he says, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness” (1 Jn. 1:9). God does not require us to be perfect before he blesses us, but he does expect to be sensitive to sin, confess it as such, and repent so that the sin does not begin to affect our relationship with him or give Satan a legal right to afflict us. Dealing with sin as a believer is not automatic, God tells us to confess our shortcomings on a regular basis or our prayers may be hindered. Typically, when we fail to confess sins, it is because we don’t really want to give up the sin. That is nthje attitude that damages our relationship with the Father.
Another condition for answered prayers is found in James. “You do not have, because you do not ask God. When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures” (Ja. 4:2-3). Sometimes, we don’t receive what we want because we simply do not ask. It is possible to hold an entitlement attitude toward God. In a culture that tries to convince us that we are entitled to every good thing, we may simply believe that God should meet our every desire whether we ask or not. I do believe that God, as any good father would do, will bless us without asking for every little thing, but God also wants us to ask so that we do not forget the sources of our blessings.
An additional condition is also found in that passage. James tells us that if we only pray selfishly for ourselves, God may not want to reinforce that attitude either. We can certainly ask things for ourselves, but God wants us to keep the needs of others in mind as well as concerns for the kingdom of God on earth.
There are additional conditions throughout scripture. If you want to be promoted, you must humble yourself. If you want mercy, you must extend mercy. If you want to avoid judgment, you must not judge others. If you want to be trusted with God’s blessings, you must be a good steward of those blessings. I’m convinced that we often ask for things that we are not prepared to steward well…a promotion at work, a ministry role at church, a marriage that we desire, some significant financial blessing that we are seeking. God may not give us what we are not prepared to manage well because we would damage what he has given us or it would damage us until we have matured more in that area of our life.
So, when God has not answered certain prayers, before being angry with him, we may want to ask ourselves if there is a condition for the answer to our prayer that we have not yet met. Not every prayer falls under this category, but many do.
