On several occasions I have talked about the essential need to know who we are in Christ. Our view of ourselves – our self-image – either places limits or lifts the limits on what we believe we can do in life or even receive in life. There is a concept in social sciences called “ the self-fulfilling prophecy.” It is the idea that we act in ways that confirm our already existing beliefs about ourselves.
For example, if a young woman grows up in a home where she is ignored or even abused she will likely believe that there is something wrong with her and that she is unworthy of love or success in life. Otherwise, why would her parents or other significant people in her life have neglected her or treated in in such hurtful ways? Because she experienced so much rejection at home she will anticipate experiencing the same rejection in all of her relationships because, as a child, she will believe that she is the problem rather than broken parents.
Lets say that she carries that view of herself to her first day at school. Believing that others won’t like her and fearing some level of rejection, she will probably find a seat in the back, she will avoid making eye contact with the kids coming in her class, she will be anxious and her “non-verbal’s” will telegraph those feelings. She will probably look unhappy or sullen. As the other new kids come into the room they will sense all of that but will interpret her actions and her body language as someone who is unfriendly and maybe a little hostile. From their perspective all those things say, “stay away” and they will probably honor that message. They will avoid sitting next to her until no other seats are available and may not even start a conversation with her when they have taken their seat. At the end of the day, she will go home having her beliefs confirmed that something is wrong with her and that she is unworthy of love and friendship because the other children were “so unfriendly” to her. In actuality, she was the unfriendly child but her own preconceived beliefs about herself caused her to act in ways that confirmed those beliefs and she is now even more convinced that her destiny is to be friendless and loveless.
On the other hand, if a young girl grows up in a home where she is affirmed and encouraged and given lots of opportunities to face appropriate challenges and succeed, she will go to her first day of school with entirely different expectations. She will expect others to like her and value her and will expect to do well in school. Her openness and confidence will invite others to start conversations and even sit next to her so that at the end of the day her positive self-image will also be confirmed in her mind. We act in ways that confirm our beliefs about ourselves so that belief becomes more ingrained than ever.
How we view ourselves and how we feel about ourselves sets us up for success or failure in many arenas of life. Our view of our worth, our significance, and our competence will encourage us to embrace life or hide from it. It’s not that a negative self-image or identity cannot be overcome but it must be overcome in order to fulfill our God-given potential. Knowing that, God has said many things about us that are intended to shape our identity or our self-image in Christ. For the next few blogs, I want to explore some of the specific truths about who we are in Christ to help us further accept the identity that is ours in Jesus Christ.
In my next blog I will begin with the truth that we have been “born again” and that we are “new creations.” If we can believe that, then who we used to be no longer has power over us. More about that on Monday. Be blessed and know who you are in Jesus.
