Well…it’s nearly Thanksgiving so it seems appropriate to say a little about giving thanks. As children, some of us were taught to always say “thank you” for any gift or courtesy. Apparently, not everyone was taught that bit of etiquette, but God certainly wants his children to say, “Thank you.”

Paul wrote. “Rejoice always,  pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you” (1 Th 5:16–19). Three directives are set out here for God’s people – rejoice, pray, and give thanks. The directives point to a lifestyle, not just an occasional moment of rejoicing, praying, or being thankful. Rejoice always. Pray without ceasing. Give thanks in all circumstances.

Interestingly, these are also keys for mental health. At a recent conference in South Africa, a breakout session on mental health emphasized that the practice of “intentional gratitude” was a bedrock of mental health. The idea of intentional gratitude is the art of learning to look for things in your life for which you can be grateful and then expressing gratitude for those things on a daily or even hourly basis.

I have met with many, many people through the years who, at least from my perspective, had significant things to be thankful for, but had become focused on one issue in their life that was not what they wanted it to be. That negative focus on the “one thing” created a kind of tunnel vision that kept them from recognizing all the other good things in their life. As a result of their constantly negative focus, they became depressed, bitter and resentful. They typically took offense at God for not answering that one prayer and took no notice of the thousands of others prayers he had answered.

Without doubt, some of the “unanswered prayers ” were related to real tragedies – the death of a child, a divorce, a longing for marriage that had never been fulfilled, the loss of a business, a crippling disease that had yet to be healed, and so forth. These are real things that impact individuals and families. But God has never promised us passage through this life that does not include loss, pain, and trouble. He simply says that he will walk with us through the valley of the shadow of death.

The truth is that we must accept that we may experience deep pain and disappointment in this world. The promise that God will wipe away all tears is for the next world. But intentional gratitude will alleviate much of the pain in this world that may be self-imposed. Thanksgiving is a spiritual discipline that keeps us from losing our balance and that keeps us from forgetting that we are loved by God. If we practice that discipline between the hard seasons, we can remember to look for his love and blessing even as we stand beside a grave. That is what gives us hope.

I have heard this verse misquoted and, I believe, misunderstood. Some say we should thank God for all circumstances. But, he says in all circumstances. The difference is significant. If I thank God for my cancer or for the death of my child, I am saying these things come from him. If I thank him in that circumstance, I am thanking him that he is with me, shall sustain me, and will bring me into a place of comfort once again. That is my hope. Because of Jesus, he shall turn my mourning into dancing.

I believe our ultimate question is whether God loves us or not. Every blessing, every encouragement, every meal, every healing, every person who cares about us is an expression of God’s love. If we evaluate his love on the basis of one tragedy, disappointment, or loss, then we miss the reality that he is still loving us and caring for us in a myriad other ways.

Giving thanks in all circumstances is a key to mental, spiritual, and relational health. As we come into this season of Thanksgiving, we may want to begin to be more intentional about perceiving his love and acknowledging it through prayers of thanksgiving to him…for the big things and well as the smaller things of life. It is his will for us in Christ Jesus and his will always brings a blessing.