Can two walk together, unless they are agreed? Amos 3:3

The somewhat familiar passage from the Book of Amos listed above, embodies an important principle in the spiritual realm. Basically, it states that those who are in agreement with one another form some kind of unity – they walk together. That’s because there is no neutral ground in the spiritual realm. You are either with Jesus or against him. He declared, “He who is not with me is against me, and he who does not gather with me scatters” (Mt.12:30). There is no “unaffiliated” category in the unseen realm. You are either a believer or an unbeliever. There is no “agnostic” box on the ballot.

Because of that, agreement is critical to our relationship with God. That’s why James warned the “double-minded,” who were trying to live with only a partial commitment to the Lord and his standards, by saying, “That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does” (Ja.1:7-8). Being double-minded is not just about whether I believer there is a God or not or whether I believe that Jesus died for my sins. It more often falls in the category of whether or not I believe God’s word is true for me.

Most Christians, if asked, would immediately declare that they believe that the Bible is the inspired Word of God and is, therefore, true. Knowing what is true is critical because Jesus taught that the truth will set is free. And yet, my experience is that many, many Christians are not free. They are still in bondage to past hurts and past mistakes. They still walk under a cloud of rejection and condemnation. They still feel insignificant and unworthy. They still do not feel the love of God and often medicate their emotional pain with some addiction. These good people love God, pray, and attend church on a regular basis and yet can’t seem to break free from their pain and their pasts.

It is also my experience that, on a personal level, they do not believe God’s word for them. In conversations or counseling sessions, they often respond to the promises of God with, “Yes, but…” When God’s word declares his love for them, his provision, or their value and significance in Christ, they reject that truth for them. The issue is that they give their emotions, the wounding words of mothers or father, or the lies of the enemy more authority than the word of God. As they “disagree” with God’s word they unknowingly agree with Satan and through that agreement he gains a foothold in their life. The underlying belief in their objections is that if their feelings don’t agree with God’s word, then his word is not true…at least not for them. It is a trap that prevents many of God’s people from experiencing the freedom that Jesus has purchased for them. Remember that the blessings of heaven are accessed by faith.

The path to healing and freedom often must begin with a decision of the will to declare that God’s word is true regardless of our feelings. It’s good to confess that our emotions and automatic thoughts don’t line up with the Word as long as we stand on the truth that we are in error rather than scriptures – that our emotions are liars rather than God. Our prayer and our confessions must be aimed at bringing our feelings and automatic thoughts into alignment with God’s word rather than distorting his word to match our emotions.

The key to realignment is the renewal of our minds and the revelation of the Spirit in our hearts. The renewal of our minds will come with a constant expression of God’s truth through our own verbal declarations, meditation, conversations, writing the scriptures, memorization, etc. It is how we establish new neural pathways in our minds and extinguish old pathways that contain and prompt our automatic thoughts. At a deeper level, we need the Spirit to give us a revelation of those truths in our hearts as we pray for that revelation and listen to his voice. As we renew our minds through the Word, that truth eventually seeps down into our hearts where the real issues of life reside. Revelation, however, seems to be a moment when the Holy Spirit bypasses our intellect and deposits God’s truth in our hearts. When that happens, God’s truth overrides the lies the enemy or life has written there.

It all hinges, however, on our first and persistent decision to give God’s word more authority than our own feelings, hurtful words, wounds from the past, and our old thought patterns, which often contain lies from the enemy.   Think about your agreement. Where are you agreeing with Satan more than God? Wherever we would say, “Yes, but,” concerning God’s word and his promises for us, there is a pocket of unbelief. Those pockets can give Satan a foothold, which eventually becomes a stronghold. Ask the Holy Spirit and your spiritual mentors to point out the “Yes, buts” in your life. Apply the word of God to those places and give God’s word more authority than those old familiar feelings and beliefs. It is your first step to freedom.

.

I honestly can’t remember what I have written about this subject in my blog before this morning, but I feel as if the Lord wanted me to speak into this issue again. The issue is homosexuality. Who would have ever thought 50 years ago that our culture and many churches would have embraced this lifestyle, framed it as a civil right, and declared it to be good or natural? I want to say from the outset that I have no personal axe to grind with those who struggle with homosexuality. Some of the most talented and likeable people I have known struggle with this issue. However, the “rightness” or “goodness” of an issue cannot be determined by how nice or talented the person is who practices the sin. There are also many talented and likeable adulterers in our culture as well as pedophiles, drug dealers, embezzlers, gossips, liars, and child abusers.

The standard that establishes whether or not a behavior is a sin is the Word of God and if we are to be faithful followers of Jesus we cannot disregard that Word regardless of our cultural standards or even our personal feelings.   There was a time when slavery was the cultural standard but thankfully the church did not give into or embrace that standard forever. What if homosexuality is a kind of spiritual slavery? If we give in to the cultural norm then no one gets set free.

Without quoting all the scriptures that clearly define homosexuality as a sin I will just site a few references here for you to pursue if you are not already clear about the biblical standard – Gen. 19:4-7, Lev.18:22, I Cor. 6:9, Rom.1:26-27. By the way, Paul did not write his letters in an era uninformed about homosexuality. He wrote his letters in the midst of a culture in which homosexuality was widely practiced and accepted by the ruling and the “educated” classes of Rome.

I have not had extensive experience ministering to those struggling with homosexuality but I have had some experiences that may be representative and may be helpful to someone reading this blog. These stories will require a couple of blogs so I hope you will be patient. Let’s begin with a young man I will call Mark. Mark walked into my office one day as the young adult son of church members where I served as an associate pastor at one time. Mark had just graduated from a Christian college and was still trying to figure out life. He came in, dropped into a chair, and got right to the point. He asked, “What does the Bible say about homosexuality?” I took him to several passages in both the Old and New Testament and read those to him. He sat there devastated and explained that we was a practicing homosexual and a Christian but had trusted his friends who had told him that scripture, especially the New Testament, had nothing whatsoever to say about homosexuality.

I asked Mark to tell me his story. He had gone off to college and was assigned a dorm room with a new friend named Ron. He said that they hit it off immediately and soon became close friends. After a year as dorm mates they were so connected as friends that they moved off campus and shared an apartment together. At some point they felt so emotionally connected that they couldn’t imagine life without that relationship.

Mark told me that eventually they came to accept that they must be “gay” to have those kinds of feelings for one another and then just gave into the lifestyle and the urgings of other “gay friends” they had met. I asked Mark if he had been sexually attracted to Ron before they discovered their “homosexual selves?” He said, “Of course not. But once we understood who we were, we started being sexual with one another because that’s what you do.”

Mark and I visited for another half hour. We talked about David and Jonathan whose “souls were knit together” as best friends without being homosexual. We talked about Jesus and the apostle John who seemed to have a very deep connection. I explained to Mark that we can enter into deep, same-sex friendships that are just that – friendships – and the relationship can still be godly. Here’s the problem: Our culture is so broken that we can’t separate love from sex so when people discover a deep emotional connection with one another (as brothers and sisters might experience), our culture imposes a perverse sexual template on that relationship rather than letting it stand as a deep friendship. Solomon himself said, “There is a friend who is closer than a brother” and he was without question a blatant heterosexual. Satan loves to take what is holy and distort it into something perverse. He has done that with friendships. Mark was struck with the possibility that he was not, in fact, homosexual by nature and left my office in an almost dazed state. I didn’t see him again for a long time.

Two years later, I was sitting alone in the LAX airport waiting for a connecting flight and Mark walked up to me out of the crowd with an attractive young lady next to him. He introduced me to his wife who “knew his story” and although they were working on some issues they were doing fine. Jesus said, “You will know the truth and the truth will set you free.” In Marks’s case, he had been deceived into believing he was homosexual by nature but the truth released him to live out his life as God intended. I’m convinced that others are in bondage for the same reasons. God created us to have deep same-sex friendships without sex and without sin and those deep feelings of friendship do not make us homosexual.

In my next blog, I will tell you how being set free from a spirit of homosexuality released two people I know personally from a lifestyle of homosexuality. Be blessed in Him.

Lies are a great strategy of the enemy to take us out of the game.  It’s simple.  If you hear a lie often enough you come to believe that it is true.  Once you believe that it is true, you will act in ways that seem to confirm the truth of the lie you have believed. Satan is a master at orchestrating such deceptions.

Let me give you a simple illustration.  A young woman is brought up in a home where she experiences a great deal of criticism and rejection.  On occasion she is told that she is worthless and that no one will ever want her.  She stores that lie up in her heart and comes to believe that she is unworthy of love and friendship.  She comes to believe that if anyone ever truly got to know her they would reject her. To avoid inevitable rejection she avoids relationships.   On the first day of school she arrives early and sits in the back where she won’t have to risk much interaction with others students who she believes will reject her just as her parents said. When students come in, she avoids eye contact and appears sullen. If they speak to her she makes little response. Her body language announces that she is not interested in striking up a conversation and so the new students honor her non-verbal sign that cries “Stay Away.”  At the end of the day no one has spoken to her and in some classes no one even sat next to her.  She leaves that day with her belief that she is unlovable and unworthy of friendship reinforced.  The lie she believed about her lack of worth and significance produced behaviors that reinforced the belief.  All she had to do was smile and be friendly to have a totally different experience.

Some lies are planted in our homes behind closed doors while others are planted by our culture through the media and our education system. Several years ago I had a young man whom I had never met come into my office.  I’ll call him Todd (not his name). He was the grown son of some members of the church where I was serving.  He introduced himself and quickly and got to the point.  He simply and bluntly asked me what the Bible had to say about homosexuality.  I read several passages to him from both the Old and New Testaments that clearly stated that a homosexual lifestyle was sin.  He looked devastated as I finished reading the passages.  I asked him why he came in.  He told me his story.  When he was eighteen he went off to college and shared a dorm room with another young man he had never met.  However, they soon became close friends and in their sophomore year left the dorm and shared an apartment.  Todd then told me how emotionally attached they became to one.  It was then than both of them gave into their feelings and began a homosexual relationship.  He felt a great deal of shame about it but couldn’t bring himself to break off the relationship.

As we visited, I asked him if he and his friend had been sexually attracted to one another in the early stages of the relationship.  Todd seemed to be shocked that I had even asked the question.  His answer was revealing.  “No! The thought of it was repulsive but because we felt so strongly about one another we knew we must be gay and so the sex just naturally followed.”  We continued to talk about the possibility that men and women could have deep friendships and emotional bonding without a sexual component to the relationship.  Scripture says that David and Jonathan had such a deep emotional bond that their “souls were knot together.”  Solomon said. “There is a friend who is closer than a brother.”  There is no suggestion that there was any sexual component to these friendships.  They were just best friends.

The cultural lie that Todd had bought into was that love and sex are equivalent.  Somehow we have lost the ability to separate the two – even among friends.  Fifty years ago boys had best friends with whom they shared their deepest fears and greatest hopes. Young girls did the same and even walked around in public places holding hands.  There was nothing sexual about the relationships.  The all grew up, got married, raised children and continued to stay in touch with best friends.  Now the lie is that if you feel emotionally drawn to anyone of the same sex you by definition are gay.  If you are gay then the relationship must become sexual.  That is simply a lie and our media and education system reinforce the lie.

We speak of homosexuality as if it is another gender – male / female / homosexual.  God did not create that category.  He simply made them male and female. I’m not saying that all homosexual relationships are friendships distorted by deception. There are other factors as work in many of those relationships. But I know many are deep friendships that have been redefined and distorted by our culture. Deep same-sex friendships without lust are very biblical and healthy.  Our cultural preoccupation with sex has all but stolen these godly friendships from us.  Those who are caught up in the gay lifestyle are afraid to walk away from it because they fear they are doomed to never have love in their lives.  But love and deep friendship can exist without lust and sex.  Deep emotional connection can occur between friends just as it can with family members.  This cultural lie has cost us on many fronts

Todd was astonished to discover that his relationship with his partner could have remained a “best friends” relationship without sex and without shame.  In that moment he realized that perhaps he wasn’t born with a genetic mandate to be gay. He thanked me for my time and walked out the door.  Two years later I was sitting alone at an airport in L.A. waiting on a connecting flight.  Out of the crowd Todd walked up to me with a young lady next to him.  He introduced me to his wife.  He said she knew everything about his past and that he still had some struggles related to his past  but they were working through all that.

Jesus said, “You will know the truth and the truth will set you free.” If truth sets us free then lies keep us in bondage.  Satan is the master of lies so we must be masters of truth. Scripture is our foundation and if anything is true, then it is God’s truth – whether it comes by scientific discovery or revelation.  It is all God’s truth and will not contradict God’s word.  Whether a lie is planted in our hearts by hurtful families or by cultural propaganda, it blinds us to who we are in Christ and the destiny and glory he has for each of us.  Paul told Timothy not to lay hands on any man quickly.  He meant that Timothy should not be too quick to give authority to a man he had not proven.  The same is true for cultural beliefs and assertions. Don’t be too quick to agree just because you keep hearing it stated over and over.  Weigh it against God’s word.  Do your homework.  Know the truth because knowing it will keep you free.  Be blessed today in God’s truth.